Four months after the first outing, about ten posts on facebook, four days of twitter, several local posters, plus countless verbal nudges, emails, and the uber casual dropping into conversation, Mothers’ Ruin was back.  The second coming happened this Saturday, upstairs at the Telegraph (aka The Earl of Derby) in New Cross, and was meant as a fun night out for the locals, particularly with parents in mind but any human welcome to come along, grab a drink and join in the fun.

So the big question was, was it worth it?

shame they didn't spot the dodgy floorboards

Well, the venue was perfect, no complaints from either the manager or any local residents about the noise.  No hassle or fuss.  The only issue was that the uneven floorboards made the decks, particularly the right hand one, jump.  This wasn’t just when a heavy footed dancer trod in the wrong place.  This was when anyone came too close to any of the offending floorboards, and being floorboards they stretched right across the room.  This also happened when I (as daintily as possible ) moved to the right to select a new record.  Which is not so great when it’s all about the beat, and every beat came in either a second too late, or twice, or sometimes over and over again.  It was funny, I’ve got to say, as it made most people laugh, and you can’t be a snotty dj who gets cross about such stuff, but having no roadies at the time I couldn’t do much about it.  And it’s frustrating for anyone listening, not just the dj, because most people just want to hear the music properly.  For me, the major annoyance factor here is that it deterred people from really letting rip on the dancefloor, even if just a bit.  I could see those German high kickers and they didn’t feel they could kick so high – or so often.  And kicking, jumping and dancing is one of the (several) things that Mothers’ Ruin is about.


The other drawback is that the later opening hours meant a too long set for me.  Get out your violin!  Not an earthshattering disadvantage but it reinforced the fact that I didn’t really get a break, a chance to catch up with many of the kind friends who had come along to support, or even a toilet break.  Thanks Kristyn for making me go at around 12.15 (and thanks God that I returned back before a new record had to go on, otherwise who knows what might have happened).  So this is a quick shout out for another dj who would like to share deck duties with me… I might ask the mighty D Rex but if anyone out there is willing and able, and stationed not too far from the south east of the London, please comment at the bottom.

Not to harp on about the bad bits but I also really don’t want to have to keep going on about it to try to get people to come.  You really shouldn’t feel obliged, you should want to come, and not just to support my wild idea that it would be fun ‘for the community’.  Hopefully, if I do this next time, I will have enough followers on twitter, who then tweet on to their and their and their followers, along with the friends who have enjoyed and returned and brought their and their and their friends.  It will gain a bit of momentum and will start to walk on its own.  Please don’t come because you feel you ought to.  And please (talking to myself, now) don’t do it ‘for the people’, do it if you enjoy doing it!  That’s the advice to self over with.

Enough of the serious talk, as Mothers’ Ruin is about fun and jumping and above all music.  I have had lots of comments since Saturday night and they have all pretty much said ‘Excellent music’.  I’ve said before that I’m not a dj who is bothered about mixing properly, I’m not someone who knows their rrps, I mean bpms, but I would like to mention again that the Dino Collective (that’s me and Dafe) do have some fine records.  I did have to borrow a few choice cuts from aforementioned D Rex, who nobly stayed at home to babysit, but to be honest who remembers who bought what?!  (we both think we do and it sometimes causes a difference of opinion but I take it is a compliment when he likes to nick my records).  I suppose there is a formula to what I play, in that it goes loosely from Latin through to 60s soul, via 70s funk, 80s disco, 90s pop, naughties dance…  It is basically supposed to be music which makes you feel good, and make you get up and shake your pants.  Pity about the point above (dodgy floorboards, jumping records), but I’m glad to say that there was still some dancing, even if in some of the pictures it only looks like only one very sparkly lady was dancing…well done Lucy for showing that mothers can still really shake their thangs and get all the way down (and still get back up again).

all the single spangly ladies

And as for who came, well lots of my lovely pals who probably thought I wouldn’t forgive them if they didn’t (which is not true).  Plus they brought their friends, some even brought men with them, which was great after last time, and the funniest part was when a group of about 5 boys came and joined us, presumably from the pub downstairs.  They looked like they were students of no older than 20, some quite gothy, they stayed a bit (without dancing) and went away again.  And then they came back later!  I like the fact that the young goth/indie boys still like da funk (even if they wouldn’t lose their cool enough to dance to it).

Special thanks to my NBF and fellow Brockley DJ Obee for not only designing the fantastic t-shirt that I modelled, but for also pre- and post-tweeting about the event and even turning up and bringing his lovely wife.  Do go to if you want to educate yourself on so many reasons why New Cross is better than New York (especially see post #19 about Mothers’ Ruin), and while you’re there you might need a t-shirt yourself, or indeed a bag.  I’m sure you’ll agree that the yellow is rather fetching and goes wonderfully well with some stretchy leopard pants from Deptford Market.  The tees come in loads of colours, plug plug etc etc.

I will just sum up by saying that from my vantage point in the corner behind all the wires and the wonky turntables, everyone looked like they were chatting, drinking, making new friends or just enjoying gossiping with their old ones.  I think they were basically having a bit of a laugh and listening to good sounds while they did it.  And afterwards most people didn’t have far to stagger home.

I leave you with my favourite sound bites on or since the night.


‘impeccable music’


‘had a great time last night’

With a bit of reflection I’m thinking that Mothers’ Ruin again erred on the side of success.  So, do you think I should do it again?

Will you come to the next one?

Will you bring a friend or two?


About hattydaze

South East Londoner, born & bred & still here. Over 40 and trying hard not to look it. It's all about the music and the film and arts and culture. Plus photos, photos are great. Married and with 2 fantastic children and 3 naughty cats. Love music Love photography Love film Love theatre Love putting on discos and films

7 responses »

  1. I love dancing, and so does my husband. We were teenagers in the 70s, and love all shake-your-butt dance music. Not too many venues round here (Godalming, Surrey) for a 40-something boogie, but sounds like fun!

  2. hattydaze says:

    Reblogged this on hattydaze and commented:

    As recently seen on my other blog (can you keep up?)

  3. Sorry we missed it – boogie boarding was great! Doesn’t sound like it was a patch on this, Adam and I will definately be up for it next time. DJ Trafford eat your heart out! xxxx

    • hattydaze says:

      Ah Luce, yes DJ Trafford is my inspiration, I have to say. Just need to get the splits going and get onto the dancefloor a bit more myself. Will make sure to invite you both next time! xx

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